Okay, so here I am exhausted AF and being honest. Last week was rough. As a family we had the type of September and October that should be locked in a closet and never let out again. I’m sure you can relate. You know those months where EVERYTHING goes wrong all at the same time? It makes for stressful times. Between my writing schedule, the kids school schedules, co-parenting with an ex, and about fifty wrenches thrown in our way; I went to bed and didn’t get out of it for two days. I couldn’t. I was emotionally drained and psychologically exhausted (lack of self care), and I didn’t want to speak (didn’t want to do anything actually). And so I didn’t. I cried a lot if that counts as something. Avett stayed in bed with me and man that baby gives me joy where I can’t find any. My bed was littered with baby toys and bottles and he was the only person I was okay being with. Sounds dramatic, I know. But, man, I don’t know how to rest. It’s a sickness. People who go non-stop and put everyone else’s needs before their own are susceptible to cracking sometimes. You need someone in your corner to tell you that you’ve been going too hard for too long, and that you desperately need to rest and breathe. I don’t know if you have someone like that in your corner, so I’m going to tell you. You need a YOU break. Okay? Please. Your mental health, your mind, your nurturing of your family hinges largely on your mental health and happiness. No matter what anyone tells you you are entitled to your own space, and you have a right to fight for your own happiness. Being a mother doesn’t mean you cease to exist as an individual. You’re still there, buried under the saggy tits and dry shampoo. Your dreams, and visions, and hobbies still matter even after you expanded your life for a partner and small humans. It doesn’t matter if you’re a mom, if your family is judgmental, if you “should” feel soooooo lucky about your wonderful life. You are a human who sometimes runs out of juice. Your cup dries up because you pour, pour, pour. Refill without guilt, my friends. Carve out some space for the girl who used to have time to wash her hair, and have perky tits. Create, sleep, cry, rest, go to a movie, take a bath, read a book, lock yourself in the bathroom (I do this). I love you and you’re still you.
My sweater (that you asked about) wasn’t supposed to be on the blog. I’ve mentioned before that I shop in the men’s department often, and that’s where I found it. Josh liked it so much he went and bought one for himself (we won’t be wearing them at the same time). But, I linked it for you. I’m seventeen pounds down and I’ve stuffed myself into two pairs of my larger jeans! I’m wearing a men’s small in the photo and it fits perfectly. I normally wear a woman’s Medium.
Labor Day White
If you’re like me and don’t mind breaking fashion rules I have a pair of pants for you! I plan on pairing them with chunky sweaters all fall and winter. They’d look great with a pair of black booties too. One more week till my kids start school and I’ll have a few more hours to work. A lot of you ask me how I do it all. Right now I have a sleeping baby in my arms while I put this post together. I spent the morning with him strapped to my chest in my Ergo while I stood at my hightop table and wrote a chapter for my next book (rocking side to side). It’s definitely about mind over matter, acclimating to new situations, and being willing to work under and in any circumstances. How bad do you want it? Good. Do whatever you have to to get it. We’re women, we can if we really try. That’s our gift.
Not Dora’s Backpack
So, I have a terrible back. And by terrible I mean that sometimes the condition of my back gets so bad my hands stop working. They just seize up and I can’t drive, or write, or pick things up. Claw hands, for real. Thankfully, it’s been about four month since it was bad enough to affect my hands. Since I am an author (and blogger) the nature of my work is to always be lugging a computer around with me. I favor messenger bags, I like they way they look, and I like to wear them cross body, but every time I used one I payed the price for days after. I switched to a backpack so that the weight on my back would distribute evenly. It’s better, but not an answer to the problem. Either way, I get crazy compliments on this one whenever I wear it. I linked you below.
This sports bra is one of the best purchases I’ve made in a long time. I actually bought it at a train station in Italy, and immediately went into the bathroom and put it on. Hello, it’s a sports bra! So comfortable. You can wear it under so many things and have it peek through all fun and sexy. I threw in a couple of extra options for similar style bras. And also the link for my patio table because you guys always ask.
So, here’s a story…
I went to a very, very strict private college. We had a girl’s basketball team, a girl’s volleyball team, and A girl’s soccer team. We had cheerleaders. They wore culottes. You can imagine my mortification when I pulled what I thought was a skirt off the rack and they turned out to be culottes. I was frightened. More so when I carried them to the dressing room and tried them on. I questioned my sanity when I walked them to the register and bought them. Culottes. Like they wore at my strange college, the same college that made us wear panty-hose, and group date. Anyway, here I am…in culottes.
All the Saints
Soooo, Ellen Degeneres has a shoe line. Maybe you knew this, I did not. What the what? Comfy flats with cute words across the toes? Yes please. There are three word options, and three color choices. I wish they said hate…or death…or…Gross. Alas, mine say LOVE. Ewwww (so cute). They’re great, but everything Ellen does is great.
My purse is the softest leather and I’m in love with it. It’s perfect for spring/summer because it’s not… black. Also, have you met Lenny&Eva cuffs? They’re mix and match.
Sup, y’all! All the pretty colors. We took a day trip down to Tulip Town with my mom, step dad and kids. It was perfect…except my puppy…and my son…and….
Ryder was grouchy. Sometimes he wakes up in the morning and you just know it’s going to be one of those days. He accused people of not caring about him, made awful grunting noises, whined about everything, punched his sister, demanded new toys, and told us over and over that he was having the worst day of his life. Not even the tulips could cheer him up. The rest of us had a really great day. It’s a pretty magical things to see an ocean of flowers. Outfit details below.
Free the Stripes
All the sales, guys! My Free People top is 40% off right now. So is my Miranda tote! You hardly ever find a Miranda for that price, true story. By the way, I almost returned my new Kate Spade shoes after they arrived in the mail. I tried them on and decided they were uncomfortable right away. But, I have to tell you after wearing them all day (and walking all the places with my nature loving boyfriend) they didn’t hurt one bit. As it turns out they’re incredibly comfortable, and I have an intense love relationship with black and white stripes (you should see my house). And hey! If you’re in a warmer climate I linked you to the exact same top but sleeveless! (also on sale)
Target Does High/Low
You know, I’m not going to lie and pretend I’m not a clothing snob. Back in the day (or three years ago) Target was too expensive for me. Target clothes were a luxury. And while I still sometimes shop for clothes at Target, I’ve become disenchanted with their jeans (they stretch out), and I have serious issues with their undies (they fade and stretch out). But, there is one thing Target does very right, and that is their cotton tee’s. They wash well, they’re versatile, they’re half the price of every other retail store. So, when I spotted this very soft, very cool high/low tee I snatched it up. Well worth it, especially for the $19.00 price tag. High/Low is the “in thing” right now, and why not purchase where it’s both a good quality, and a good price. Also, have you invested in a pair of Converse wedges? So comfortable. I wear mine a couple times a week.